White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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