So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
