Its about making memories worth repressing
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Terrible idea I love it
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize