i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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