I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
