just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize