Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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