Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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