her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
