I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
