hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
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