Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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