i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize