I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
