her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize