Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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