She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
