idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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