...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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