Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
