My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize