capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
