We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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