He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
