fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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