matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
