Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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