C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
