okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
She told me I should be a condom model.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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