That's when you crack a 10am beer
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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