you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
