I am puke
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
What a dumb baby whore.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
