Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
