god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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