The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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