Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize