he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Boobs are out for the taking
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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