Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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