I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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