i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
