The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Randomize
