Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Randomize
