I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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