whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
