that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
