There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
