Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Help. Why am I so naked?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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