I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
