is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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