Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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