i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
